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  • kieltiel871
    kieltiel871 is now friends with Guakstick
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  • Hello once more!

    I've posted some Chapter updates, those being:
    • Prologue
    • 1
    • 2 + 2.5
    • 3 + 3.25

    There are still more edits to come, but exams have got in the way of proper work on this, so hopefully these will do. Chapter 9 is finished, yet I will need to post my Chapters 3.5 to 4ish to have it make sense.

    I hope you enjoy what is there at the moment, and apologise for the delay.
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  • If you don't mind the set-up, use Custom NPCs. You can set their health, attack damage, pretty much anything to as high as you want, give them AI behaviour; the choice is yours. I play(ed) a lot of single player and I never really install mob mods, so while I may not be too much of a help, I can try give you some advice if you need/want it.
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  • ZpknTr wrote: Man!! U are not a human... i even hate autodesk etc. stuff but they are way easier than Toolbox...
    I only have 1 suggestion for u:
    U are using too much boxes and this causes a little lag and eats ram...
    And ram is a big issue for multiplayer servers...
    Can u try to use less boxes or whatever it is and try to shape with defining positions?
    (ik its a hard thing to do)

    It's hard to get good levels of detail with less shape boxes. If you are making a server like LabJac's for example (Survival Multiplayer) you could always limit the weapons to higher tier. Otherwise, I'm sorry, but the amount of shape boxes really can't be decreased.
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  • Guakstick
    Guakstick thanked the user tdboytd in the forum post, Mpack: (QBZ-95-1/ARX-160/G36)
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  • Hello everyone! I wasn't planning on posting this until my early-chapter edits were complete, but I think due to the season I should post this. So, please enjoy Chapter 8.

    Chapter 8: Infiltration

    “So, I’m just gonna go through it one more time.” Aryn said as they bounced up and down in the back of the truck, their breath creating clouds of condensation around them in the freezing temperatures.

    “You’ve gone through this like six times already!” Lyll said, his head in his hands.

    “Well I want to make sure we all get what the Overseer told us.” Aryn replied, but was cut off by Marric over the comms from the cabin passenger seat.

    She said that ‘We are to enter an abandoned Skymare research and mining facility, to secure the area and then wait for her to arrive. We will need to gain access to the central mine to complete the final steps of her plan, and that we are to be wary of enemies from inside the compound, or any that may have followed us’.

    “Not like many people would want to follow us up here.” Alessia said, sitting huddled in the corner to stay warm. There was a chorus of chortles as the truck continued along.

    Now a good time to hand out the masks?” Arcadio said over comms from the drivers seat.

    “As good a time as any I guess…” Lyll said, reaching into a bag by his feet and pulling out what appeared to be a compact form of gas mask, which was handed around to everyone except Silent, obviously.

    Aryn took off his helmet, pulled his mask on and secured it with the straps around the back of his head, and then re-secured the helmet in place. Despite having already tried them on, it surprised him how little of his vision was obstructed.

    The Overseer had advised them to use the masks, as the area they were travelling to had previously been used as a testing ground for all kinds of weapons, and there were heightened levels of radiation in the snow and dust, so the masks were to make sure they didn’t breathe any in. She had also warned that energy storms appeared more frequent in the area due to the energy misbalance caused by the mine, and it could disrupt electronics at that high of a level.

    A sudden shuddering motion brought Aryn out of his thoughts, and he noticed they had stopped.

    The snow is too thick to get any further, but I think I can just about see the research base.” Arcadio called over comms, and they heard the engine turn off.

    Lyll lowered the tailgate and they all jumped out, the snow enveloping their feet to just below the knee. Drawing their weapons they followed Arcadio slowly towards a rocky hillside just visible in the early morning light. As they got closer Aryn noticed a pair of hangar bay doors set back into the side of the hillside, with some smaller buildings just outside, making it look the part of some kind of arctic research station.

    Nearing the external buildings, Arcadio signalled for Aryn and Lyll to check one of the closest outbuildings to identify their purpose. They split off from the group, as did Alessia and Gades to check another, and as they approached Lyll cried out, suddenly stopping and falling over into the snow.

    “What happened?” Arcadio said, rushing over as Aryn pulled Lyll back to his feet.

    “There was something under the snow, I don’t know what, but it certainly wasn’t ground.” Lyll replied, shaken. Aryn slowly reached down and brushed away the snow, and recoiled. Lying before them was a frozen, mutilated corpse. Its skin was blackened by the cold, but what was left of it had been perfectly preserved. It was so deformed, there were no distinguishing features hinting at its species.

    “How long did the Overseer say this facility had been closed for?” Marric said, his head appearing from around Arcadio’s shoulder.

    “About seven years. I guess they would have stayed preserved this long…” Arcadio replied, gazing over the large gashes in its sides, strangely angled limbs and what appeared to be bullet entry holes at its chest.

    “Come on, we’ve got to keep going. The other buildings appear to be small storage warehouses.” Alessia announced, having appeared behind them. She looked down at the body. “There are more of them around. A few on the steps of one of the buildings, and I’d bet that there are more of them inside.”

    They rose to their feet and walked cautiously over to the hangar doors, which loomed over them, easily able to fit a reasonably sized aircraft. The doors were slightly ajar, and the gap was just enough to slip through. Through the space only an expanse of darkness could be viewed.

    Someone have a torch?” Arcadio whispered. Marric unclipped a flashlight from his belt and turned it on. They slipped past the door, and into the hallway beyond.

    It was wide walled and tall ceilinged, but after that the normal features of an indoors area disappeared. Where the light swung, they could easily see many more mutilated bodies piled against the wall, many closest to their entrance point frozen, the ice crystals still visible on their bodies. There were large blood splatters encompassing large sections of the walls, with panels hanging loosely from the ceiling and walls, torn electrical wires visible, the occasional cable hanging straight down, blocking their advance into the darkness.

    Woah…” Lyll breathed, staring around at the carnage.

    Arcadio signalled for them to move forward, raising his rifle as he began to creep ahead into the blackness. The others followed closely behind, continuing to stare around at the wreckage. Their footsteps echoed off the walls, reverberating down the passage. As they continued side corridors could be seen off to the left and right, some blocked up with debris, covered in blood or piled high with dead bodies.

    After a multitude of minutes walking in deathly quiet, they reached a large door blocking their path, similar in design to that at the base entrance. A sign, which hung off the wall beside it, read ‘Mine Entrance’.

    I guess this is end of the road. Should probably get this open.” Marric said, pulling his backpack off of his back, opening it, and withdrawing five RHA plastic explosive charges.

    I would stand back. Like, really far back.” He warned, setting the munitions against the door. The others all backed away, and hid in the nearest side-passages, Lyll and Aryn having to throw some more corpses out into the hallway to make room.

    Are you sure the place won’t collapse?” Alessia asked as Marric scampered around the corner, detonator in hand.

    Don’t worry, I’m sixty-three per cent sure.” He replied, smiling at her dismayed expression.

    Ten. Nine. Eight. Seve- Oh who am I kidding it’s boom time!” Marric announced, and pressed down firmly on the trigger. There was a deafening bang and cracking sound which shook the entire area so much the piles of bodies slumped to the floor.

    You never were one for warnings were you Marric?” Arcadio said, rubbing his ears to get rid of the tinnitus.

    They all stepped out from their cover viewing body parts strewn across the floor from the dead who lay at the base of the door when the charges detonated. In unison, they stared at the door as Marric redirected his torch to it.

    Are you serious?” Said Alessia.

    That SHOULD have worked…” Marric replied, hands on his hips gazing at the unmarked door. It appeared the cracking sounds they had heard was in fact the concrete ceiling.

    So Marric, what does your ever-present wisdom say we should do next?” Lyll inquired condescendingly.

    As far as I can see, we have two options. Either we get some power on in this place and find the mechanism to open the door, or we can try a different kind of explosive. This is a mining facility, so some of the warehouses out front probably hold a few spares.” He replied, turning around to see them all staring at him in disbelief. “What? That’s my judgement.

    You want to blow this up again?” Gades asked, raising his eyebrow.

    Look, it just an option, I mean, who knows if there’s still fuel for the main generators, if the back-up turns on or even if they work at all. If they do and we find the controls, we won’t need the explosives. But I think it’s better to have them ready sooner.” Marric reasoned, gesturing towards the door and out the way they came.

    I guess that makes sense.” Aryn said thoughtfully.

    Fine. Alessia, Gades, you take Marric to go find the generators. Me, Lyll, Rhys and Silent will look for the door controls. Aryn, you go out to the warehouses and look for those explosives.” Arcadio voiced, sighing, admitting defeat and going with Marric’s crazy idea.

    They all nodded except Silent, who pointed at Aryn, then past him down the hall, and holding up a finger.

    He’ll be fine man, Aryn can handle himself. No need to worry, right mate?” Lyll responded to Silent’s actions. He then switched his attention to Aryn. “Yo dude, if you need help with carrying them back or something happens out there, just radio in.

    Aryn grinned as Lyll tapped the side of his helmet, smiled back, and punched him playfully on the shoulder. Aryn began to walk off into the blackness, turning around to give Silent a thumbs-up, and then continued his journey down the lightless corridor.

    As he strode forward his mind wandered, imagining what life would have been like if fate hadn’t decided to mess his life up so thoroughly. He pictured himself graduating from university; the happy faces of his family being the only clear ones in the crowd. He was so engrossed in his thoughts that he didn’t recall when he had slipped through the front doors, or the headache began to form.

    Aryn was snapped out of his fantasy when his temples pulsed painfully. He looked around him, noticing he was not too far from the entrance, and looked around to see wisps of snow licking their way along the ground with significant speed in the distance. Suddenly, without warning, he was almost blown off his feet as a gust of snow whipped past him. His headache was becoming more unbearable as the seconds passed, the energy storm raging around him, blocking all visibility; it was all white.

    He held up a hand to his helmet as he trudged in the direction he hoped was back into the base, and pressed on the comms button.

    Can anyone hear me? Guys? Anyone?” He spoke into it, but was only met with static.

    ‘Of course,’ Aryn thought to himself, giving up on that idea. ‘The Overseer said most electronics wouldn’t work in a storm.’

    As he trudged through the ever-increasing volumes of snow he made out a dark shape, and hurried as fast as he could towards it. It turned out to be a tree trunk, stripped bare by years of storms and blackened by the sub-zero temperatures. He decided it was best to stay by the tree as a reference point.

    Almost as suddenly as it came, the winds died down, leaving snow and dust hanging in the air around him, painting his vision near totally white. He stared around, searching for any other features in the gloom other than the tree he resided beside.

    There was nothing.

    He was lost.

    And there we have it. Chapter updates will hopefully arrive early January, along with Chapter 9 mid-to-late January. Epilogue should be around the same as Chapter 9 as well.

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  • kieltiel871 wrote: Are you guys planning on adding a Thompson?

    Already in, at least with a drum magazine.
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  • Greetings!

    So, I feel it's minor update time. And by minor update I mean where I'm going with this. So, similar to the last time I did this, I'm going to try and cover everything that I have planned for the future of this series. This is gonna be fun...

    To begin...

    1 - The Schedule:
    I've planned it out roughly. I'm planning to have Origins finished in its first iteration (with the plot mainly done) by late January/early February 2017. Epilogue may be released some time during February, I'll see how I can fit it in. At the moment I'm juggling finishing off Chapters 8, 9 and 10 as well as doing the secret chapters and planning out two side stories. Phew. And they say I've got time to study...

    2 - The Third One:
    So, for those observant you'd notice I updated my signature with an extra bit of detail. So, time to officially announce [Hellfire - Headhunters - A Greylight Tale] . (Yes, that is the official title. Yes, that is going to apply for all other ones.) This will be the final story in the main series, with a batshit crazy ending I credit TheOrion for coming up with. Also note I said final in the main series. Oh yeah, it's going to get real.

    3 - Spin Offs, Side Stories and Breaks. Oh god these...:
    Well this is fun. I can now announce each officially considered side series as of this time - there will be no plot spoilers, just where they will come in the story (TBD is referring to the fact most of these do not have a title yet):
    Backwaters - Between Origins and Exile
    TBD - Between Exile and Headhunters
    Short Stories from the Lupine Union - All over the place - Various stories and types of story, ranging from backstory plot to recounts, etc. Written by both me and TheOrion.
    TBD - Late Origins to Midway Exile - Jason Bourne inspired series (I mentioned this previously)
    TBD - Throughout all three - Focusing on Lupine Union Military (Army, Navy, Airforce) who all get their own stories to coincide with certain chapters. More on that later...
    TBD - Set around five years after Headhunters - A side series about what happens afterwards. Fun stuff hopefully.

    Small note to make though; while not necessary to read the side stories it will give a better understanding of certain plot points, plot elements or character choices/decisions.
    And that's (I think) all I have so far to talk about side stories. Message me about names if you can think of any, but must work with "A Greylight Tale" at the end.

    4 - Speaking of Secret Chapters...:
    Well this is gonna be fucking up my planned order of Chapters... Alright, so I wasn't happy with the Prologue, and Chapter 1 - 5. So I'm redoing them. Most of the plot will still be there, it'll just be changed. Just a bit. Ok, maybe a bit more than 'just a bit'. Actually, drastically is a better word. In addition to this, I'm adding at least three more chapters in, a 2.5, 3.5 and 4.5. (Won't be called that, but that's what I'm calling them in my head) These will focus more in detail on life at Blackveil and another battle chapter. There'll also be extra detail and some changes to later chapters to accommodate for these inclusions.

    5 - My Thanks:
    I want to say a massive thank you to everyone who supports the story and says such nice things about my work, it really means a lot to me that people appreciate my work. I am also considering posting this story series onto other websites to grow a larger base of readers. (I'll have to consult Derpi as to whether I can post what is really his work with my twist somewhere else)

    And I think that's everything to talk about for now. I'm hoping to get Chapter 8 released by mid December if I push myself. (I have to do my edits to earlier chapters first though)

    Anyways, I hope you've enjoyed so far and will continue to enjoy everything I have to write for your viewing pleasure. It's been an honour,

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  • Smooth. Looks nice TD. Very nice indeed.
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  • ErnestWri431 wrote:

    Guakstick wrote:

    ErnestWri431 wrote: Aye this is some nice story brewing in.

    Took me a night to read everything, haha.

    But there's some clićhe though.

    The clićhe is important, it adds some humour (at least later on) and helps the story run smoother. Glad you enjoyed, any ideas you have will be very much appreciated.

    Fun fact: I will be triggered when a sensitive clićhe hits me.

    And I would ask you to remember that I have a wider audience to consider. I can't please everyone, so you can be triggered as much as you like.
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  • Hello everyone! So, as I said, Chapter 7 didn't take too long, it was one of the most planned chapters I've written so far, so the writing went rather smoothly. Anyhow, please enjoy this new Chapter.

    Chapter 7: The Plan

    The streetlights glowed an eerie orange as they walked through the night-time suburban area, crossing the road and walking up the short drive to the door of an average sized detached house. Compared to the next-door residence, it looked abandoned, with no light emanating from within. Aryn walked up to the fogged glass window and peered inside.

    “Are they even home?” Marric asked, shivering in the cool breeze.

    Opal had landed in an abandoned warehouse district at the inner edge of the Penbar slum district, despite their target being located in the suburbs. She had cloaked the ship and decided, at Arcadio’s suggestion, gone to buy some civilian clothes for them to wear. She also picked up two large sports bags to hold their gear in. She then had to depart, as it would seem suspicious if a team of inmates and their linked pilot disappeared all at the same time. They had then proceeded to sneak around the area, sticking to shadows and eventually reaching the correct address after nightfall.

    “Hold on a sec.” Aryn said, as he dropped his bag and walked around the left of the house, and made his way along the side wall, reaching a gate and pulling himself up and over, landing smoothly on the other side.

    He walked slowly around the back of the house, sticking close to the wall until he reached the back door, where a mat lay at his feet. He moved the mat aside, and as he had hoped a key lay underneath. He picked it up, and with his other hand picked up a plant pot beside the door. Turning the pot so he could see the bottom yet the plant would not fall out, he inserted the key into a slot on the bottom and turned it. A small compartment opened up, revealing a chain of keys. He took this keychain, closed the compartment, removed the old key and placed it back under the mat. Using one of the new keys, he unlocked the back door, and stepped inside. He smiled to himself at the thought that he had told his parents how stupid it was to have a hidden compartment in a pot for a geranium.

    He quietly closed the door behind him, and turned to face the empty kitchen and dining area. He took a careful look around. There was a layer of dust covering each surface. A cobweb inhabited the top left corner, the small spider sitting lazily in the centre. Aryn walked through the room, small dust clouds swirling at his feet like tumble weeds, and ran his finger over the dining table, leaving a long line in the dust.

    After staring around with a judging look he cautiously made his way to the front door, where similar layers of dust lay on every surface. Unlocking the door, he put a finger to his lips and ushered them inside. He reached down and picked up the bag on the floor, looked left and right down the empty street, walked back inside and closed the door, locking it. He carefully placed his bag down, opened it and withdrew his pistol. Arcadio, Lyll, Marric and Rhys all drew their pistols, and Aryn signalled for he and Arcadio to clear the upstairs, Lyll, Marric and Rhys to clear the downstairs and for Silent to remain in place. They all nodded, and departed their ways, the dust muffling their footsteps.

    They opened doors and cleared as they had been trained, no signs of life or disturbance. There was more dust everywhere, instinctively making Aryn want to clean around.

    “Clear.” He said sharply as they reached the landing, walking back down again to meet the others who nodded.

    “Completely abandoned.” Lyll said, looking around the pitch-blackness wonderingly. “How long do you reckon your family has been gone Aryn?”

    “I’m not sure… Has to be at least a month. Maybe more. Not sure why they would leave though.” He responded, as they walked into the kitchen, Aryn opening the fridge and peering inside. He, Marric and Lyll promptly opened the back door, ran outside and vomited into the outside bin. As they came back inside, Silent closed the door of the fridge.

    “Ok, so that definitely means they’ve not been here for a while.” Aryn said, trying to get the acidic flavour out of his mouth. “In the meantime would you guys mind helping me clear up this dust?”

    They spent a few hours clearing the dust out of the rooms they would be using, which Aryn had decided were the bedrooms, kitchen, dining area and living room. With no light, heating or water as it seemed the bills hadn’t been paid, they simply worked in the darkness.


    It was two in the morning when the team simply dropped onto the Aryn’s parent’s bed, and snoring quickly followed. Silent had shuffled into a corner, and remained unmoving. Aryn quietly walked around, realising for the first time since they had arrived just how much had changed. As he looked through each room, there was no sign he had ever been there, otherwise everything seemed exactly as he remembered, as if they had left in a hurry.

    He moved on a hunch, and decided to check in the garage. He walked outside and using the key opened up the garage around the side of the house, which would have been the right side of the house looking from the front. As he suspected, a tarpaulin lay across a large object in the middle of the room. He pulled it back to reveal his father’s Areilla Motorcycle, a civilian version of that used by the Lupine Military, black in colour and looking less like a scooter. It looked more like a motorbike out of a videogame he had seen advertised, featuring a Lupine skilled in infiltration, and possessing a strange habit of smoking cigars. He smiled at the memory of when his father had bought it and given him a test ride, and how much his sister had protested, saying she wanted to go first. He checked the bike over, noticing that the keys were in the ignition.

    After some more minutes of remembering fun times with his family, he pulled the tarpaulin back over the bike, exited the garage and locked it again. As he walked to the back door, there was a rustling sound beyond the fence to the left of the garden. He instinctively reached for a sidearm, but remembered he was unarmed. Suddenly, a head popped over the wooden barrier, and Aryn breathed a sigh of relief.

    “Hello Aryn!” The young boy said, chin barely reaching over the edge, but Aryn could see the wide smile on his face.

    “Hello Ace, it’s been a while hasn’t it. What are you standing on to be able to see over if you don’t mind me asking?” Aryn replied, smiling as the young wolf wobbled dangerously. He approached the fence.

    “A tree log.” Ace replied once the wobbling had stopped. “Where have you all been? You disappeared for a while, and then your family just left two months after you had gone. No one’s claimed the site, but I did see some strange people turn up the day after the others left.”

    “Oh, that’s interesting. What kind of people?”

    “Err… people in suits, black suits. I’m not sure why though.”

    “That’s ok Ace, I wasn’t expecting you to know why they were here. So… do you know why I haven’t been here for a while?” Aryn hesitated as he asked.

    “Nope. When I asked no one would give me a proper answer, I just heard something about you did something and now no one wants to talk about you anymore.”

    “Well then, you’d better not tell anyone I’m here, I want it to be… a surprise. You’d better promise me.” Aryn reached over, extending a pinkie finger, which was returned and shook with a similar gesture.

    “I was wondering Ace,” Aryn asked as he stepped back from the kid. “Why are you up at four-twenty in the morning? Shouldn’t you be asleep?”

    “I had a bad dream. I woke up, looked outside and saw you walking out to the garage. I wanted to say hello.”

    “Ah I see. Well you have said hi, and you had better go to sleep; I need sleep as well. Make sure you don’t tell anyone I’m here, I want it to be a surprise.” Aryn reiterated.

    “I understand Aryn. Have a nice night.”

    He watched the kid walk off back into his house and sighed. At least he now knew around about how long his parents had been gone, and luckily he knew Ace wouldn’t tell his parents that Aryn was back, the kid trusted Aryn too much to do that.

    Aryn made his way back inside and as soon as he reached the bedroom fell onto the bed and into a deep sleep.


    Aryn was woken by the sound of footsteps downstairs, and a sudden thud noise. He quickly got up from the bed, wiping the drool from the corner of his mouth and looked around in the early morning light as the sun rose behind the drawn curtains. He quickly noticed everyone was still asleep, and Silent was still unmoving in the corner. With as little noise as possible he moved towards the bags of gear they had dumped in the corner, and picked out his sidearm, and just as quietly moved out of the room, down the stairs and noticed that the front door had not been broken through. He continued to the dining room door, stacking up beside the doorframe whipped around after a deep breath and pointed his gun into the room.

    “Well good morning to you too.” Said the Lupine between Aryn’s sights, a toothy grin behind the metal mask, hood drawn over the gleaming green eyes.

    “Oh. It’s you.” He replied, lowering the gun, his eyes drawn to the plastic bags placed on the table.

    “I thought you all might need some sustenance.” She said, crossing her right leg over her left in an authoritative manner.

    “Hey… What’s going on?” Marric yawned as he entered the room from behind Aryn.

    “We have company.” Aryn said, gesturing towards the Overseer who gave a curt nod.

    “Oh. Ok then…” Marric said, not noticing who was being addressed in his early morning stupor. Aryn turned around to watch Marric’s ascent back up the stairs, but as he reached the door there was a loud knocking, causing Marric to jump heavily.

    Aryn walked over to the door, Marric clutching at his chest behind him, and opened it. Beyond the threshold stood Alessia, with Gades behind her, both in civilian clothes.

    “Good, you’re here.” The Overseer said, having poked her head around the doorframe to see just who it was. “I knew you would turn up, but you two are far more unpredictable than the other lot.”

    Within a few minutes Aryn had woken everyone upstairs, bringing them downstairs to sit in the dining room. The Overseer had dumped the contents of the bags onto the table, which turned out to be food and water. They moved forward swiftly and nabbed whatever they could. There was a pause when the Overseer stood up and reached into her cloak and retrieved a packet of something.

    “I think you will benefit from these Ms Navarev.” She said, tossing it to Alessia, who caught the box and looked at it, smiling.

    “Well, this is a nice change. I thank you. It has been a long time since I last had a smoke.” Alessia replied, opening the box, withdrawing a cigarette and placing it between her lips. She then pulled up her sleeve and removed a patch on her upper arm, which Aryn guessed was a LU issued substitute.

    “Rhys, may I have a light?” She said, turning to the silent wolf, who didn’t turn to look at her. Slowly he opened the jacket he was wearing, withdrew and then tossed over a Primed Blazite Canister. She chuckled, and tossed it back.

    “Hey, you know what I mean, can I use your lighter?”

    Out of the corner of his eye Aryn saw Arcadio stiffen as Rhys turned slowly and glared burning daggers into Alessia, who didn’t react, though on the inside she recoiled heavily. She swore she could see the flames in his eyes.

    “That doesn’t matter Ms Navarev, I brought one for you to keep.” The Overseer cut in, saving Alessia from more discomfort, as she caught the thrown lighter. She then proceeded to stand by the back door and listen from a distance as she lit the cig.

    “Well, now that we are all present, I think I had better outline the plan.” The Overseer began, as they sat around, chewing on food and listening with rapt attention. Aryn could tell it was going to be interesting.

    (btw Author's Note the "Blazite Canister" is the LU Fire Grenade)
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  • Guakstick
    Guakstick thanked the user tdboytd in the forum post, Mpack: (QBZ-95-1/ARX-160/G36)
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    Guakstick thanked the user DerpiWolf in the forum post, [1.7.10] Greylight Content Pack (Version 2.1)
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    Guakstick thanked the user TheWillyJ in the forum post, Willy's Vehicles
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  • ErnestWri431 wrote: Aye this is some nice story brewing in.

    Took me a night to read everything, haha.

    But there's some clićhe though.

    The clićhe is important, it adds some humour (at least later on) and helps the story run smoother. Glad you enjoyed, any ideas you have will be very much appreciated.
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